Well another birthday, doesn't feel any different, but honestly they never have in particular. I loved being 4, I thought 6 was the perfect age(and my favorite number), I looked forward to 13, so I would be a teenager(crazy kid!),I looked forward to 16 I remember, so I could drive(well legally, anyways!), 18 to drink (and again, legally!), and I remember wanting to be 20 so I would be out of my teens, but after that I didn't care much until I was about 25, then I wanted to be 30. My friends were mostly in their 30's, and it just seemed like you garnered more respect if you weren't 20 something. Over 30 seemed better, people are better looking in their 30's, have more money, not so foolish, so I only liked being in my 20's for maybe 3 years, then I was done, ready to move on. Now almost to the mid-point of my 30's I am quite satisfied at being where I am. I have accomplished some life goals regarding career, family, some travel, and my next goals really I am not expected to accomplish for about 7 more years, so into my 40's. At the moment the thought of being older doesn't bother me(but this may be that mellow state I was talking about, I am a little sedated lately about things and think "ehh, so what?" about a lot of things!), frankly I like the idea of being at that place in my life, I look forward to what my 40's will bring. I hope I also look forward to each decade and stage in the same way, but for different reasons. I guess as long as I still feel like the same kid I was, and the person I am in some way, I can grow older keeping in mind who I was and who I am, which may benefit my kids in that I remember (all TOO well I think) the trials and tribulations of being a kid, a teen, and a young adult. I am no longer hung up on what went wrong, what I didn't have, or what I thought I should, so I hope I have learned some things. Every year I feel like I discover more things I don't know, and attempt to glean knowledge from the more learned and experienced people in this world, many of whom I admire. Now don't get me wrong, even my role models have faults, naturally, but I am as ok with their faults as I am with their positive attributes, which i don't think I was 10 years ago.Maybe that is the difference I ahve learned. I don't know, I could spend another decade trying to extract how I have changed in the past 10 years and not come out any the wiser. This may be the whole point though, the journey, not the end point. Enough with the overthinking I think, just need to air my thoughts once a year lol.
This has been quite a summer, we have kept busy for half of it, and now that we are stuck in the city till school due to gymnastics, I have had more down time to relax, re-coup my brain and just be mellow. I spend almost all my time with the kids, trying to do lots of activities and getting rest in for school too. We have had some very difficult things to deal with as a family, due to illness, and lets face it, when a parent is in school it is stressful to the family. But I can say overall we have enjoyed the summer despite it, and despite the fact Winnipeg is not my choice place to live. As Maria's wedding looms I feel excited, it has been years since anyone really in our family has been married, almost all of my cousins have been married longer than me(all but 1 of them actually), and so a wedding is kind of nice. There will be 6 flower girls and 2 ring bearers if you count Josh-he and Kedan will walk together, but who knows what he'll do! It is exciting, I hope this will bring back the joy of fall for me. I have not been able to enjoy it as much since Dad died, and now that this is coming on 2 years, I hope things start to feel more normal and less forced. I love fall, although it is not very pretty here, but we look forward to it all the same. The kids have started planning our decor, costumes and parties already!(Mind you I have also started buying Christmas ornaments (I got 7 collectible ones and want 3 more for this year when they arrive in October).
We went to lunch today, the kids love their soups there, then trotted over to Laura Secord for ice cream and to pick up another ornament, mimi is collecting the flower fairy series, noni some of the barbie's and jr just some assorted boyish type ones. Me? snowmen and cast pewter of course, what else?
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