I swear....

I will upload photos. I will.....
Tonight was tourtiere. I make this rich dish annually, and the past two years it has always been in January. I love French food. Although this is French-Canadian, the richness of the pastry in a savoury dish is quite French. Apparently tourtiere was originally named for the actual utensil used to make the dish. I have found a few variations to this recipe, some very odd ones which include game of various sorts even. I like a combo of pork, beef, aromatics (although which ones you use can be debated: I use celery and onion), seasoned with clove, cinnamon, nutmeg, savory, s&p. I use Aunt Dorothy's pastry recipe, almost the only one I ever use, it was wonderful. I made a nice ketchup with fresh tomato, chili sauce, cilantro, onion, garlic. Some use potatoes, I like to stick with the meat as the focus. I go a bit heavy on the spice, I have a hugely emotional attachment to the scent and taste of cloves, childhood pomanders and Amelia making me on at the age of 6...that and the holiday season.

Something about this recipe reminds me of Ontario, perhaps because I first made it while we lived there, either way, it was a very happy time. I developed a real passion for food then, interesting ingredients were more easily accessible, and frankly our growing season accommodated more variance as well. To me all food worth eating has emotion attached. Food, good food, is spiritual and satisfying, a bonding moment, with others and myself while I prepare it. Time in the kitchen is therapy. Running is my therapy too, but the trails bring out different thoughts such as how to figure out this bloody work booking thing, and should I take the term doing liaison work....and possibly lose my vacation chance this summer?? Cooking never brings those stresses to the surface. I can immerse myself in the task, pulled away to put heads back on Playmobil or say hello to Henry.

The dish was devoured tonight, with Amelia picking it apart wondering about what was in it, Lauryn simply eating it, and Josh lifting it up crust first into his mouth in whole slabs. We talked about Henry, school schedules and nothing in particular.

Its warm in here, its pouring outside. Josh has fallen asleep on my shoulder, hand entwined in my hair. It was a good day.
See, photo. I cheated this is the one I made last year, I did not take a pic this time, but it looked virtually the same. The exception is I carved the kids initials in the top for fun.....